Zombies are among us!
Ok, they’re not really, but what if they were? Could your business survive and if necessary thrive?
Just for fun (or because we like AMC’s The Walking Dead) we thought we might put together a little something we call “The Cloud Computing Survivalist Guide To A Zombie Apocalypse“. That’s TCCSGTAZA for short, catchy we know 🙂
Step 1 – Plan Ahead
There are different levels to zombie invasions. On one end of the spectrum, you can have small incursions that can be controlled by the military or sufficiently armed and inebriated citizens. On the other, you have a full-scale apocalypse that could possibly wipe out all of mankind.
Regardless of the severity, expect that once the dead start rising from their graves, people will panic: stock markets will crash, governments will declare martial law, and people will start flocking towards safe zones.
In all that, you have to be ahead of the curve. You’ll want to know how to manage your mission-critical data in the event of this catastrophe. You’ll need to know whom to work with and whom to rely on. You’ll especially want to know how to make your business mobile, since you’re going to have to be more agile.
Step 2 – Be Agile
One of the great flaws of buildings today is that no one considered zombie-proofing their offices. That’s just sloppy architecture: staying in these deathtraps during the apocalypse is suicide. You’ll have to abandon them and go on the run.
But what about your business?
Cloud service providers can give you the infrastructure you need without having to secure one place for it all. Moreover, they can give you as much computing capacity as you want to develop, test, and/or run applications. And if you need to expand or contract this infrastructure, you only need to give the order.
Devops can help with your agility as you can continually release reliable software or applications with the goal of business agility and high quality of service
It’s an excellent business survival tool in a new world of chaos and uncertainty.
Step 3 – Defend Your Data
In the worst case scenario, a cloud provider can archive your data for you. That way, even if your business should halt or your data centers are completely overrun by the undead, you can rebuild much faster once the zombies have been reduced to fertilizer.
Recovery would be a matter of minutes instead of days.
As for the safety of your data, top cloud providers are already protected by military-grade security forces in a hidden location, much like Fort Knox. If that center falls, other zones will also maintain a copy. So while you are ensconced in a safe zone, your data will be safe too.
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Step 4 – Move Money Online
Money is the life blood of your business, so you need to keep it flowing if you want your business to maintain a pulse. Of course, you can’t expect customers to visit banks or write you a check directly, what with a case of the ravenous dead going around.
Again, cloud solutions can help by allowing your customers to pay online. Cloud payment systems are secure and completely private, allowing clients to transact while keeping their financial information secret. What’s more a credit card payment facility directly embedded into your website not only inspires customer confidence, it also allows them to transact remotely in the safety of their own bunkers or while on the run.
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Step 5 – Collaborate Remotely
If you aim to keep working—say, your company provides a vital service that’s needed even in a zombie invasion—you will have to do so even with your colleagues scattered to the four winds.
Here’s a simple solution: put everything online and work in a cloud workspace. This allows you to work on the same files and documents simultaneously, with everyone on the same page.
You’ll find that your team will be very grateful, not having to get to a workplace while battling hordes of zombies along the way. And if someone needs to run because their Dead Aunt shows up unexpectedly for tea and brains, well, the work will still be waiting for them online once they’re safe again.
Cloud computing helps keep your business agile—especially when your life literally depends on it!
Step 6 – Build Your Team
Needless to say, it will be very difficult to find good help during an apocalypse. Your workers are your company’s lifeblood and are more important than ever.
So choose them well: select people skilled in both business and survival. Provide them with weapons and timely information, and bring them with you to safe zones. As for the greedy, the unstable, and the ones unwilling to pull their own weight, well, just don’t send them the memo.
Clearly, you can’t do most of these things after the zombie apocalypse has begun—you need to plan ahead. Zombie-proof your business early by getting expert IT support to help with your planning and prep.
If you and your business can survive a zombie apocalypse, you can survive anything.
Feel you’re unprepared? Get in touch with our expert cloud and anti-zombie consultants here at PolarSeven.